Trust me: don’t sleep on this one! If you are a fan of Schitt’s Creek feel-good quotes, then you’ll love these biting Roy Kent quotes from Ted Lasso. And the awesome Ted Lasso drinking game and Coach Beard quotes and Ted Lasso Coloring Pages as well! ps- if you need more laughs, read the quotes from Free Guy movie!
About Ted Lasso
Jason Sudeikis plays Ted Lasso, a small-time college football coach from Kansas hired to coach a professional soccer team in England, despite having no experience coaching soccer.
Is Ted Lasso safe for kids to watch? Parent review will help you decide.
Watch the trailer for Ted Lasso Season 2 here.
He’s Every F’ing-Where! Roy Kent Quotes From Ted Lasso
You know the chant- go ahead and sing along!
Roy Kent, Roy Kent, he’s here, he’s there, he’s every-f@cking-where, Roy Kent, Roy Kent!
Roy is hardcore when it comes to playing the game of life: except when he’s soft as can be.
Who knew he’d have a yoga/reality tv club and a soft sport for his adorable niece?
Love these Roy Kent lines from Ted Lasso (season 1 and 2!).
- Don’t you dare settle for fine. -Roy Kent
- Probably homesick. Closest thing he can find to a Dodge Ram. – Roy Kent
- Most adults think kids need to be constantly entertained. Its Bullsh!t. I didn’t need an Fing parade every day growing up, did you? Truth is- they just want to feel like they’re part of our lives. Little idiots. – Roy
- Oi! You listen to me! You play like that next week, you can kiss the trophy goodbye, ’cause today, you all played like a bunch of little pr!cks! You hear me?
- Enjoy your trophies for winning nothing. – Roy
- One of the goals was disallowed because apparently 9 year olds aren’t allowed to do headers yet. Fing brain development. – Roy
- The 28th- the sexiest of all the days! – Quote from Roy Kent in Ted Lasso
- What do you have to be sad about? Did one of the Paw Patrol dogs die? – Roy
- Roy- we are not going to go beat up a little kid. – Keeley
Why not? – Roy
- I think you might be dying. – Roy Kent quotes from Ted Lasso
- He’s fine. That’s it. Nothing wrong with that, most people are fine. But it’s not about him. Its about why the F do you think he deserves you. You deserve someone who makes you feel like you’ve been struck by Fing lightning. Don’t you dare settle for fine.
- No, I thought they played like sh!t. All right. Chelsea was sh!t today. They were shocking. Watching them, you’d never know they were playing at home. They were too timid. They were too respectful of United. They were lucky they didn’t lose by three or four or ten. Who gives a sh!t, Chris? That’s no excuse to play like you’re afraid of ’em. You could see it in their faces: abject terror. Like children waiting in line for the handsy Father Christmas. Have some f@cking pride in your shirt or don’t f@cking wear it. – Roy Kent quotes on Ted Lasso
- Jamie Tartt is a muppet. And I hope he dies of the incurable condition of being a little b!tch. – Roy Kent
- I don’t want to be a Fing football pundit. Sat on fing telly in a dumb fing suit like a know-it-all tw@t. It’s a sh!t job for sh!t people. I’d rather sh!t out my own f@cking mouth than do that f@cking sh!t.- Roy owes Phoebe a lot in her swear jar for this one!
- Jamie Carragher sent me flowers. We f@cking despised each other when we played, now he’s sending me flowers. How the f@ck does he know I love white orchids? – Roy
- I’m calling HR. – Roy Kent quotes from season 2
- Stupid barking means its over, right? – Roy Kent
- No, that’s fine. Just take 4% of my paycheck. – Roy
- You couldn’t f@cking build Jeff Bridges. – Roy
- She told me to expect a mustachioed surprise that would anger me. – Roy Kent
- I brought you here to remind you that football is a f@cking game that you used to play as a f@cking kid. Cause it was fun, even when you were getting your f@cking legs broken. or your f@cking feelings hurt. So f@ck your feelings, f@ck your over thinking, f@ck all that bullshit, go back out there and have some f@cking fun. – Roy Kent
- Too many f@cks? -Roy Kent quotes season 2
I don’t know, kinda like all the nipples in that movie showgirls. Halfway through you don’t even notice. You just kinda get sucked into the narrative. -Ted Lasso
- I dated Gina Gershwin once. -Roy Kent
That makes me happy. – Ted Lasso
- I’m sorry Roy. But I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life coaching with somebody, you want the rest of your life to begin ASAP. – Ted Lasso
Please stop. -Roy Kent
- You complete our team. – Ted Lasso
You’re an @sshole. -Roy Kent
- I’m also just a coach, standing in front of a boy, asking him if- – Ted Lasso
Shut up, just shut up. You had me at Coach. – Roy Kent
- No. Way. (mind blown) – Roy
- Hey Siri, Play the Roy is sorry for not understanding Keeley playlist. – Roy
- Stole those roses from your neighbors garden, ripped them to shredds. -Roy
- Babe, I think you’re the cats pajamas but your feet are a f@cking state. – Roy
- Sorry, yeah, he’s a living piece of sh!t. – Roy Kent
- She called one of her classmates a pathetic sh!t f@cker. – Teacher
Are they? – Roy
Oh yes… but that’s not the point. – Teacher
- Uncle Roy, can we get ice cream?
Sorry- F no. – Roy Kent
Patty Holliday is a movie critic, writer, and podcaster living in the Washington, DC area. Her goal is to bridge the gap between casual fandom and picky critic with parent movie and television reviews.