Love it or hate it, Ted Lasso brought a lot of surprises for season 2. And one of the biggest surprises was a Christmas episode dropping in August. Folks even thought it was bad? Now, Santa wouldn’t appreciate that negativity! Now that the holiday is near, it’s time to enjoy these quotes from the Ted Lasso Christmas episode: Carol of the Bells. ps- check out the Office Christmas quotes too!
Table of Contents
About Ted Lasso
Jason Sudeikis plays Ted Lasso, a small-time college football coach from Kansas hired to coach a professional soccer team in England, despite having no experience coaching soccer.
You can stream the Ted Lasso Christmas episode from season 2 on Apple TV+.
Also, check out the song playlist from the Ted Lasso Christmas episode as well!
Cheery Quotes From The Ted Lasso Christmas Episode: Carol of the Bells
This was episode 4 of season 2 of Ted Lasso.
- Scarf- cool! Bumbercatch, did you make this? – Colin
Yeah man, knitting soothes me. – Bumercatch - What a lovely inscription that you wrote completely over my head, face, and body. – Coach Beard
- Roy and I are celebrating a new tradition I’m calling sexy Christmas. – Keeley
- It’s not going to be like that. It’s gonna be a swinging- a swinging Sinatra Vegas-y type Christmas for adults where we get all dressed up, and we sip on martinis, sit by the fire, And then it’s gonna be like that. – Keeley
- I’m just going to a Christmas party at a friend’s house. – Rebecca quotes From The Ted Lasso Christmas Episode
What friend is that? First and last name please! – Keeley
Elton John. – Rebecca - Hold me closer tiny Dancer, Prancer, and Vixen! – Ted
- That sounds like Double O heaven to me! – Ted
- God bless me, everyone. – Jamie Tartt
- Sexy December 28th. – Keeley
28th- sexiest of all the days. – Roy Kent - So Sam, back home, what does Christmas make you think of? – Higgins
Colonization. – Sam
Of course. – Higgins - What have you to be sad about, one of the Paw Patrol dogs die? – Roy
- Roy- we’re not going to go beat up a little kid. – Keeley
Why not?- Roy - I think you might be dying. – Roy
- We’re going to my stupid posh neighborhood and start knocking on doors. If we don’t find a dentist within 10 houses, you each get 1000 pounds. – Roy Kent quotes from Ted Lasso Christmas
- You see, Santa’s true power is not his speed but his endurance. – Sam
- Hey! I brought fried chicken. – Jan Mas
Is that a Christmas tradition in Holland?- Higgins
No. – Jan Mas
Ohhh…- Higgins
- How’s facetime Christmas with Henry going? -Rebecca
I lost him to an overpriced guilt gift. Hubris, thy name is Ted. – Ted - I guess that’s what I get for taking a tinkle next to John Holmes. – Ted
- Oi wanker! Merry Christmas. – Richmond Fan
- This isn’t embarrassing. Embarrassing is me eating so much ice cream at a birthday party, knowing I’m no good with dairy, that I poop my pants on the bus. – Roy
Finish your story. – Keeley quotes From The Ted Lasso Christmas Episode
Three weeks ago. – Roy - You pooped your pants! Roy Kent?! – lawyers kid
- We’re not going to make it. Tell my incredibly beautiful wife I love her. – Dani Rojas
- Mom! There are two white people at the door and they’re smiling! – little girl
- Oi, Phoebs we can’t lose! Either we find out why your breath is so rancid or we get 1000 pounds. – Keeley
EACH! That’s like a month of swear words. – Phoebe
- Whoa! Are you Roy Kent? – lady at the door
Yeah. Are you a dentist? – Roy
Yeah…- lady - I’m sure Dr. Rogers has another option for you. Because she’s nice and smart, and science is real. Yeah? – Keeley
- Really? You’re willing to miss a puppet show by Daniel Craig and Rachel Weisz? Cause that sounds like a lot of fun. – Ted
Don’t get me wrong, they are incredible. But all I really want to see those two do together is f@ck. – Rebecca
Yeah, no, I get that. – Ted quotes From The Ted Lasso Christmas Episode - Right, I’m the one with the accent here, right, I forgot. Sorry. – Ted
- To the family we’re born with- and to the family we make along the way. And most importantly: to Richmond! – Higgins
Bonus Claymation Christmas Special: The Missing Christmas Mustache
Because: why not?
Series creator loved the Claymation opening for Carol of the Bells so much, he wished for a claymation Christmas special.
And here it is!
A mini-Ted Lasso Christmas episode to bless your holiday spirits. Enjoy this short, The Missing Christmas Mustache!
It’s 4 and a half minutes long.
More Ted Lasso Posts You’ll Love
Ted Lasso Quotes From Roy Kent
Patty Holliday is a parent movie reviewer, writer, and podcaster living in the Washington, DC area. Her goal is to bridge the gap between casual fandom and picky critic with parent movie and television reviews. As a lifelong fangirl and pop culture connoisseur, she’s been creating online since 2009. You can find her work at No-Guilt Disney.com, No-Guilt Fangirl.com, No-Guilt Life, and as host of the top-rated No-Guilt Disney Podcast.