Party Like The 99: Best Quotes From Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes

Let’s party like The 99 this year with the best quotes from Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes. Amy keeps trying to give presents to Holt and Gina, of course, has to save the day. It’s Noice! ps – check out The Office Christmas episode quotes too.

brooklyn-nine-nine-christmas episode quotes

Let’s party like The 99 this year with the best quotes from Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes.

Ah, The Brooklyn 99 Christmas episodes.

They are hands down some of the funniest moments of the series.

While we said goodbye to the squad this year in season 8, we certainly have a lot of holiday joy to look back on.

Here are the best quotes from the Brooklyn 99 Christmas episodes.

List Of The Brooklyn 99 Episodes

Season 1, Episode 11
Season 2, Episode 10
Season 3, Episode 10
Season 4, Episode 10
Season 5, Episode 10

Best Quotes From Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes

Jake: Boyle, frisk the skinny one.
Charles: I’ve gone 42 years without a lump of coal. I’m not gonna start now.
Amy: Sir, I’m sure you had your reasons for going to Peralta, but this is exactly the type of job I would love to have. – quotes from Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes
Captain Holt: Okay, the next time someone threatens to kill me, I’ll come straight to you.
Amy: Thank you, sir. I can’t wait. I didn’t mean- Let’s catch this bastard.
Charles: That’s right. Boom. Just kicked Santa in the testicles.
Jake: Wow, I think I really would have gotten along with young Ray Holt.
Captain Holt: Yes, that’s why I decided to change everything about my life.

More quotes from the Brooklyn 99 Christmas episodes

Jake: Woah, woah, woah. Where are you going, Cold Mountain? I changed your codename.
Captain Holt: To use the restroom.
Jake: I’m only asking this for your safety. Is it a number one or a number two? Your silence indicates number two.
Jake: And a very Merry Christmas to you, Captain. Ho, ho, ho!
Deputy Chief Gerber: Captain Holt has received a number of death threats.
Jake: Oh, I really came in here with the wrong energy.
Charles: Hit him in his fat, rosy cheeks.
Jake: Oh, that felt wrong. – quotes from Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes
Amy: Now, the Captain won’t allow us to give him all the presents we bought him.
Rosa: You are the only one that did that.

Gina: I could take a pic of myself dressed up as an elf. “Elfie selfie.”
Jake: Awesome. I’m great at secrets. Santiago got you like six presents.
Captain Holt: Attention everybody, holidays of many cultures approach. This truly is a joyful time. Join me for a festive Winter party at Shaw’s Bar this Friday, 7-9. Any questions
Scully: AM or PM?
Captain Holt: I’m gonna let you figure that one out. – quotes from Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes
Amy: I asked the captain what qualified as a gift and he said anything I spend money on. Then I realized, my time is worth nothing.
Sergeant Jeffords: Sounds like you’re bragging, but that’s just a sad statement.
Amy: Not a gift, snitch. It didn’t cost me anything. Just my worthless man hours.

brooklyn 99 christmas quotes yippie kayak other buckets

Captain Holt: Also, I’d like to reiterate my gift policy: none allowed. Enjoy this Merry Season.
Amy: Nog! Nog! A little Christmas humor.
Captain Holt: Yes, the Nog from Egg-Nog used in place of knock.
Gina: Oh, my God! I have an idea. Let’s open presents. I wanna see what everyone got everyone and how everyone reacts poorly.
Jake: Ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas! Whoa, thank you, good sir! The elves will not starve this night.
Jake: Take a good look, kids. This is what happens when you’re naughty!

Jake: I was just so focused on Amy’s gift that I completely spaced, and his present to me was so personal. Okay, think, what does Charles love? Gross food, tan pants, Masterchef Junior. Ooh, I could call up one of those kids and offer them a free trip to New York.
Gina: I wouldn’t do that.
Jake: Right, because I’m a stranger, and I shouldn’t be luring them out of state. Good call.
Jake: Gina, you just saved Christmas.
Gina: It’s what I do. Every d@mn year. –quotes from Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes
Charles: Yippie kayak, other buckets! (Arguably, these are the BEST quotes from the Brooklyn 99 Christmas episodes.)

Jake: NYPD! Stop where you are! Come on, Santa. Why are you so fat?
Jake: Ho, ho, ho, and a bottle of rum. Presents!
Rosa: God, you’re bad at being Santa.
Captain Holt: Diaz, are we still on for the polar bear swim tonight?
Rosa: It’s either that or go carolling with my family, so yeah. I’d rather walk into the freezing ocean.
Jake: Oh my God, it’s real life Die Hard. I mean, oh, no, crime.
Gina: Let’s fry these b!tches!

Jake: It’s also not necessary to touch my face.
Charles: It’s Christmas. A time for friendship.
Jake: So, just to recap, you left an unmarked package on a police captain’s desk on a random Monday with a suspicious message written on it that looked like it was scrawled by a crazy person.
Amy: Uh-huh.
Captain Holt: Bomb. There’s a bomb. Everyone out! Let’s go. This is not a drill.
Jake: Great gift, babe. –quotes from Brooklyn 99 Christmas Episodes
Jake: This is my John McClane moment.
Charles: How are going to get past them without a gun fight?
Jake: I’ll tell you how John McClane would do it. The vents.
Jake: We’re at Goodwins. There are multiple gun men. They’ve blocked all the exits. They’ve taken the security guards hostage and we’re looking for a place to hide. It’s awesome.
Sergeant Jeffords: Awesome?
Jake: Awesomely serious. I am not enjoying this no matter how much it is 100% my favorite movie come to life.

Enjoy these quotes from Brooklyn 99 Christmas episodes!

More Quotes You’ll Love

Patty Holliday

Patty Holliday is a parent movie reviewer, writer, and podcaster living in the Washington, DC area. Her goal is to bridge the gap between casual fandom and picky critic with parent movie and television reviews. As a lifelong fangirl and pop culture connoisseur, she’s been creating online since 2009. You can find her work at No-Guilt Disney.com, No-Guilt Fangirl.com, No-Guilt Life, and as host of the top-rated No-Guilt Disney Podcast.

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