Fa La La La Laugh Along With These Hilarious Quotes From Happiest Season
I fired up Hulu first thing this morning to watch the latest Kristen Stewart led vehicle- and I was not disappointed. I laughed and then I cried and then I sobbed because it’s the holidays and that’s what you do when you find a good rom-com! Come with me and Fa La La La Laugh Along With These Hilarious Quotes From Happiest Season. Now Streaming on Hulu!
Table of Contents
What’s Happiest Season on Hulu About?
Meeting your girlfriend’s family for the first time can be tough.
Planning to propose at her family’s annual Christmas dinner — until you realize that they don’t even know she’s gay — is even harder. When Abby (Kristen Stewart) learns that Harper (Mackenzie Davis) has kept their relationship a secret from her family, she begins to question the girlfriend she thought she knew.
Happiest Season is a holiday romantic comedy that hilariously captures the range of emotions tied to wanting your family’s acceptance, being true to yourself, and trying not to ruin Christmas.
Hilarious Quotes From Happiest Season
- Now this house was originally owned by Herbert Flackshaw, who started this tradition on Candy Cane Lane. He even hired his nephew Otis to play Santa Claus for many years until he was arrested for child endangerment in 1992. Oooh! You guys gotta look at this house! – tour guide
- Fun fact! Did you know that Christmas trees are responsible for an annual average of four deaths, 15 injuries, and a loss of 12 million dollars? – tour guide
- Are you ok?- Harper
I’m so great- Abby - I want to wake up with you on Christmas morning. If that doesn’t convince you to love Christmas, I’ll never bring it up again. – Harper
- I get to go meet the people who made my favorite person. -Abby
- I am all in on Christmas. – Abby
- I left a gentleman in my apartment so I’m tracking him to make sure he leaves. I track everyone. If the NSA can do it, so can I. – John
- I love champagne. – John
More perfect Happiest Season quotes from Dan Levy’s Character
- You and Harper have a perfect relationship. Why do you want to ruin that by engaging in one of the most archaic institutions in the history of the human race? – John
- Also, a fact you don’t know about me. I’m actually very good with parents. – Abby
- Do you remember this summer when I came out to my parents and told them we were together and they took it really well? Well, that wasn’t entirely accurate… – Harper
- I got carried away- and its because I love you and want to give you a really great Christmas. -Harper
You’re off to a really great start. – Abby
- Should I have some kind of cover story? – Harper
- Maybe don’t mention that you’re – Harper
Gay? -Abby - But don’t lie,
You’re a very bad liar. -Abby - Your mother’s going viral! – Harper’s mom
- Did you bring concealer? – Mom
- I asked you not to do that- Haper
I know- but I didn’t listen. -Jane
Jane, Jane… too much. – Mom - I wish my daughters had bothered to learn to play it- Mom
I took lessons for 8 years… – Jane - There she is my perfect girl! (hugs Harper)
Hi Dad – Jane
Jane- glad you’re here, the internet has been a little spotty. – Dad - Here is Harper’s orphan friend. – Mom
- She was brilliant. She and her husband Eric- he graduated top of his class at Yale– were very successful attorneys, but they gave it all up to raise their beautiful twins. And now they make gift baskets. Which is great. – Mom
- I know, right? Is it hot in here or is it just him? Yummy yummy yummy! – Jane
- Men need offices, dear. – Mom
- I just went through a breakup, he was a milk… man… – Abby
- Harper, I would never ask two grown women to share the same bed. -Mom
- Better than your room at the orphanage? – Mom
I was never in an orphanage- I was 19. – Abby
Oh, one of the lucky ones. – Mom
Well… – Abby - It takes a long time to build a world. – Jane
- Should we go to the lady’s room? -Harper
I’d hate to miss some of these stories. -Abby
We’ll be quick… – Harper - Maybe one of your exes will bring out dessert? – Abby
- Do you think they like me as much as they love Conner? – Abby
No, no… but they don’t even like me that much… – Harper - You can’t go over a year without meeting your significant other’s parents. Trust me, I have tried. – John
- Have they ever met a lesbian? – John
- Snowman pancakes. That’s a lot of work for something that turns to shit. Oh but that’s kinda like your law degree. – Harper
- This is great content- Mom
- It is crucial we take the family holiday photo for the Instagram tonight- so don’t wear anything that will strobe… Jane. – Mom
- Gwynne seems to think so. Goop picked us up and sales have been through the roof ever since. – Sloane
- Should we stop them? -Abby
No, they’ll tire themselves out eventually. – Eric - Ted, the holiday family photo is an essential element of every candidate’s feed. And if we cannot manage to post one, we do not deserve to have that account at all. – Mom
- Now that we converted the pantry- it’s a two-bedroom.- Abby
- I don’t want to have this conversation anymore. – Sloane
- You know what? I think I should Google it. I’ll Google it. Thanks. – John
- Abby- what are you doing in the closet! – Mom
- I once took too many Ambian and bought a racehorse online. – Mom
- That’s two more people on the guest list, I basically have to reimagine the entire party. – Mom
- Oh, take them to see Santa Claus. This might be the last year that they see him. -Mom
Why? Is Santa dying?- twins
No- Mom
Are we dying? -Twins - You know I’m glad I ran into you. I’m having this thing where if I stick my finger in my eye, it like, really hurts. -Abby
Yeah, I mean, that’s a classic case of um, Contact Stupiditis because it’s a stupid thing to do. -Riley - I’d really like to drink some alcohol. – Abby
- The thing that I can relate to is being in love with somebody whos too afraid to show the world who they are. – Riley
- She is very heavy-footed. -Mom
- This is why I avoid Christmas. It brings out the worst in everything. -Abby
- I saw two of their cousins get into a fistfight over a quesadilla maker at this party once. -Riley
- Oh do not put that there, what do you think this is, a barn party? – Mom
- Jesus Abby, where do you think it goes? Under the damn tree. I’m sorry, I’m sorry… you’ve probably never had a tree. -Mom
- I can’t find my Christmas Broach – have you seen it? You can tell me, I won’t be mad. I just want to know it’s safe. – Mom
- What are you drinking? -Riley
Its a spiced- alcohol. -Abby
Gross, can I have some?-Riley - So bad for them that I eventually just murdered them. -Riley
Sounds fun. -Abby
- When are you going to get this? I. Have. Been. Tracking. You. -John
- Thankyousomuch. -John
More Happiest Season Quotes!
- Do you know how painful it’s been to watch the person I love to hide me? -Abby
- I am scared to tell them who I am I will lose them. And I know if I don’t tell them, I will lose you. -Harper
- Come on guys, just hug it out. -Jane
- You just destroyed it like it was nothing. It was something. And guess what- I like myself. -Jane
- My parents loved Christmas. The holidays were just a huge reminder of them not being here. -Abby
- Harper not coming out to her parents has nothing to do with you. -John
- I want to be with someone who is ready. -Abby
- Great party. – Riley
- I was so scared you would find out I wasn’t who you wanted me to be. -Harper
- We’ve spent our entire lives trying to earn your love and I am done too. – Sloane
- I don’t have any secrets but I am an ally. -Jane
- I have always wanted to try karate even though I know its not elegant. I hate flowers- Mom
- The only reason Jane is ok is because we gave up on her when she wouldn’t stop biting in preschool. That is very far from perfect if you ask me. -Mom
- I tracked you- John taught me. -Harper
- You are my family. -Harper
- If I have you, that’s all I need. -Harper
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Patty Holliday is a parent movie reviewer, writer, and podcaster living in the Washington, DC area. Her goal is to bridge the gap between casual fandom and picky critic with parent movie and television reviews. As a lifelong fangirl and pop culture connoisseur, she’s been creating online since 2009. You can find her work at No-Guilt Disney.com, No-Guilt Fangirl.com, No-Guilt Life, and as host of the top-rated No-Guilt Disney Podcast.